Have you found yourself setting crazy big resolutions/goals on the New Year, falling off by the middle of the year and regretting by the end and using the guilt to set the next year's goals?
This is not just for the new year, you can find this pattern in the months as well. Beginning of the month you feel so ready, middle of the month, you fall off track, end of the month you are busy setting goals for next. Same with the weeks.
Why does this happen? Because we are trying to live linear in a cyclical world. Understand that if you are working pretty hard one day, you are bound to work a little less the next. And this does not un-do your progress. It is a cycle. Instead of working against it, try to work with it. This is not something made up. The moon, the menstruation cycle, nature follows this cycle. Here are some tips that will help you to stick to the goals you set without feeling guilty.
📅Tip #1: Landmarking
Why are you very motivated on New Year/New Month/New Week/Birthday? Because you create this distinction in your mind that this is a fresh start. It is a blank slate and things are new. You usually do this on New Years or the first of the month. But for most of us, we only have one landmark where we decide to start fresh which is the new year.
Create weekly landmarks for yourself. At the beginning of every week, plan out. You can do this on a Saturday or Sunday. And make sure that the tasks you are writing down are in alignment with your bigger goals.
For example, your big goal is to be healthier. Your weekly plan should include the times you are going to exercise, prepare your meals so you don't order online, etc. If your big goal is to finish writing your own book, you mini goals in the weekly plan should include writing a draft for the first chapter and the deadline for when you expect to finish it.
📅Tip #2: Review Planner
This tip goes hand-in-hand with the previous one. Make sure you take out time to review your progress or downfall. Many people skip this step and take things for granted. I had troubles with this step as well. I started doing a monthly review to see how my month was and often I used to forget the big things that happened. Just because I was not taking a review, I realized that I did make progress but since my brain had no evidence for it, it thought I was not at all following through on my goals.
Make sure you do the reviewing part for every week before you plan out for the next and same goes with the monthly planning. Write down your major highlights from the week and they will pile up to make your highlights for the month. When you will be able to see that you have written evidence of your progress you will feel better.
📅Tip #3: Planning Balance
This is very essential because people either plan down to every second leaving not space to breathe. Or they plan out very minimal which doesn't give them a direction to work on. Do not stuff your calendar up with all the things that you need to do because you are still not going to do them.
Here is an example of how to maintain the balance of planning:
If your big goal is to write a book, don't plan that you are going to write 5 chapters every single day and get this done with by the end of the quarter. It will drive you insane because you might not feel that creative every single day.
To effectively plan it out, try outlining the number of chapters you want and what you want the chapters to include like a topic. Then divide your time topic wise and let your imagination run wild.
Another example is maybe you want to be healthier and you plan that you want to work out every single day at 5 am. First, you might not wake up at 5 am and it will ruin your motivation. Second, what if the workout you are doing is not at all interesting?
Plan out the type of workout you are going to do and lay out your workout clothes, make your playlist and your snack after the workout. Then fit your workout time in your calendar when you know you'd be wide-awake watching Netflix. This will not only reduce a habit you want to minimize but also help you build another one.
📅Tip #4: Stop Focusing on the Method!
Building upon the third tip, stop focusing on HOW you will achieve your goal. Focus on the result you want. This is the most important reason why people don't follow through on their goals. Here is an example:
You want to be healthier so you decide to work out every single day. You decide on a cardio workout and you really don't like jumping or running. You are likely to binge eat or skip your workout because it doesn't make you happy. But what if you could change the way you get to your goal - being healthier? You might like dancing, find out some dance routines you'd like to practise and you'll be working out plus learning new dancing moves all at once. Maybe you like Zumba or aerobics. Do what makes it fun for you to reach your goal.
Bonus Tip: Habit Tracker
Just like I said earlier, your eyes need to see the evidence of progress. Download a habit tracker app or create a bullet journal spread something like this one to let your eyes see how you've been sticking to your habits and goals.
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